It’s been a while!

Just checking in really things have moved on since my last post. K moved up to the area that I live. His script is up here I have seen him. We talk most days. Not sure where it’s going if anywhere. I know I don’t want addiction in my life. Or at least I don’t want to enable his addiction. That much I am certain of. If he chooses to use that is his choice not mine, but I don’t have to be part of that process. I am away at the moment. In some ways that easier. I only seem to get stressed if he try’s to get money from me. To be fair he’s only asked a couple of times. But I struggle to say no. Well no I don’t struggle to say no I struggle with getting him to accept when I say no I mean no! But those of you that know what it’s like when you need a fix you will say and do anything to get it. So I get the usual chat…the swearing on everyone’s lives that it will be the last time that he will give me the money back that he hasn’t asked for ages blah blah blah. Once this court case is out the way and I go home it will be harder of course. Being in London some how makes it easier. But thought I should check in and update you all. My journey has been made easier with your comments and support. I guess it will continue to be so, I hope so. How do you have a meaningful relationship with an addict? I don’t think you can. He is trying so hard to remove himself from what is a negative environment. He says he wants a ‘normal’ life with me but do I want to go through life always waiting for relapse? I think after the last post I had time to think. It is hard to put it into words I am surprised he moved away from where he was. It shows he is good to his word to a degree. It sounds as tho he is trying to get his life on track and for that I am pleased for him. Maybe reinstating friendships he had up here when we first met, those that have succeeded might help him on his recovery. Time will tell. But now back to my recovery.

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